Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Free Money!

If you haven't already got a VC or Truepoker online poker account and you register through the banners on www.poker4charity.org not only do you receive enhanced deposit bonuses from both sites than if you register normally, poker4charity will receieve a lump sum and a percentage of your rake forever.

It's a win/win situation.

Just do it.

Monday, August 30, 2004

Anonymous said...

Replying to DY's comment that my article "The things some people will do to save $11" was a copy of his despatch from Las Vegas when he told the exact same tale on the Gutshot website, I tried to hide my embarrassment by asking flippantly "Does anyone actually read the Gutshot website any more?". I hadn't read David's article and I apologise for "stealing" his story.

However, I doubt there is much of a crossover between readers of this blog and users of the Gutshote site and I will leave the tale up as I think it's very amusing and if you've read it before I think it bears repeating.

Anyway, the third comment to that article was very interesting. Here it is:

"Anonymous said...

Whenever Gutshot is mentioned and when you post on the gutshot or mob forum you are always very disparaging about them. Can't you see they are the best thing that has happened to poker for ages and by knocking them at every opportunity is only bad for poker and looks worse on you personally.

I suppose you don't care and have no time for anyone involved in the site but please don't treat the rest of us with the contempt you are showing."

Firstly a minor point. I welcome criticism and debate, but I think it's important if you want to put something like this comment up you should put your name to it. If you can't be bothered to register on this site (It's pretty easy, even Fred Titmus managed it!) at least put your name at the end of the anonymous post.

Now, looking at the comment in question I feel I really must reply. First it is a total innaccuracy to say I am always disparaging. I supported their Charity event (which seems to have disappeared nowadays) and I acknowledge the place for a cardroom which encourages and offers the chance for novice players to learn the game.

But, there is so much to criticise when it comes to the Gutshot organisation that when the opportunity arises I find it hard to keep my big mouth shut.

Firstly, it is impossible to deny the original ethos of Gutshot Collective has been hijacked by a few of the members in order to make money. My online dictionary defines the word collectivism thus: "The principles or system of ownership and control of the means of production and distribution by the people collectively". Now the original collective did just that. There was almost a team spirit between members, when a member did well, other members were there funking and cheering for them. A particularly good run of Yannis at the Vic springs to mind immediately. However, it seems a few members saw a money making opportunity in the Collective and pounced by setting up the online and live cardrooms and using the Gutshot name to legitimise it.

The Gutshot forum is another example where the whole organisation has changed. In the early days, it was a lively and enjoyable place to read and contribute. With piss taking abounding. There were excellent contributors such as the Bald Beast, Fred Titmus, Miros and Lee Leung. With the honourable exception of Dom Sutton (who I have never met, but I find his posts endlessly entertaining) the forum is now pretty much dead. Many of the occasinally entertaining posts are deleted and we are left with arrangements for heads up matches, leaderboard updates and hand discussions. Useful maybe, but definitely not entertaining.

Now, apologists for Gutshot will say because I have never been there and sampled the "unique atmosphere" I can never know what the cardroom is really like. Well, I do know that several players who are banned from all the local casinos are allowed in the cardroom. If the playing conditions that are important to the management of Gutshot, why are players such as Malcolm Robinson and Paul Treadwell allowed to play there? The fact they do participate despite the fact they are disliked by many players (and staff too I would imagine) suggests the fact that both are "stayers", who play for many hours on end and hence swell the coffers is more important than any congeniality concerns.

Other factors which concern me about Gutshot include: allegations of collusion at the Gutshot online cardroom, facilitated by an internet cafe at the Gutshot cardroom which offers free internet access to play at the online cardroom. The proliferation of posts at various online poker forums asking questions about Gutshot which are invariably answered within 5 minutes by a member of the Gutshot management, suggesting the posts were planted in the first place.

I won't touch on my rake concerns, which were fully debated on both Hendon Mob and Gutshot forums about a month ago, except to say, I do think their rake is too high, but if people are prepared to pay it, then that is their lookout as long as rake information is available to all.

But, as for Anon's claim "..Can't you see they are the best thing that has happened to poker for ages..". This is clearly nonsense. The only people the Gutshot cardroom is a boon for, is those banned from casinos. It is like a second chance for them, as they can't play anywhere else. The Grosevenor Luton and the Vic both run beginners tournaments nowadays. The Gutshot players can/would/will play at other venues. I have managed to survive without playing there and I'm sure if it didn't exsist all the other players would find another home.

Several of my friends regularly go to the Gutshot Cardroom and have nothing but praise for it. So, they must be good at what they do. I have no qualms with anyone making a few quid out of poker. I just feel the owners of the Gutshot cardroom are doing it under false pretences. I would be very interested as to the reason the Bald Beast, who to my mind embodied the Gutshot spirit, left the Collective. If Steve Bennett (one of the people who set up the Collective originally) comes out and says he is happy with the direction it has taken, well, you will never hear another word of criticism from me, otherwise, I will continue to provide the alternative view when and where I feel neccessary.

Thursday, August 26, 2004

Lucky, Lucky, Lucky

My nephew is a bit of whiz went it comes to matters of a computer nature. Kindly, he downloaded a whole bunch of WSOP events (from Razz to PLO to NLHE they showed the lot!) which have been shown on ESPN, the American sports channel, over recent weeks in the lead up to the showing of the main event.

Several things came to mind while watching the overload of poker.

Firstly how much better the Americans are at televising poker. The commentary is mostly good, the editing is top class and the atmosphere is excellent. Sky and the various cable channels could certainly do with learning a few lessons.

Secondly, I really wonder if the WSOP will be as good at the Rio next year. Yes, I know the Horseshoe is a khazi, but there really is something special about the place. Yes, there will be room and it will be more comfortable next year. But, the Horseshow is the one venue where I get nervous before the event. The ghosts just seem to be swirling round the place. Then again, perhaps I have an overly romantic vision and I am talking rubbish.

Thirdly, the payout structures really were awful at the WSOP last year. Let's look at the first open event, the $2,000 No Limit Hold'em. 9th Placed paid $30,700; 8th was $46,040; 7th $61,380. Every prize money jump between 9th and 3rd was approximately $15,000 until 3rd was $122,640, 2nd $213,000 and James Vogl won $400,000 for taking the bracelet! How can there be such small jumps early on the final table and such massive ones at the end? It virtually forces players to make deals when they are playing for such huge differentials. Hopefully the payout structure will be much flatter next year.

But, the most overwhelming feeling I came away from watching all this poker is how badly behaved so many American players are. This manifested itself in many ways. Criticising other players, bad losing, swearing and cussing, rubbing down opponents when they were beaten and excessive celebrating. The last of these was by far the most annoying for me. Seasoned professionals whose play I admire acted like schoolchildren. For goodness sakes when you entered the tournament you expected/hoped you were going to win, so don't act like it's such a big surprise when you do win. It is graceless, unprofessional and rude to the player you've just beaten/knocked out. A whole gamut of players were guilty of these crimes: Negreanu, Matusow, Keller, Hellmuth, Fischman, Boyd, Clark, Sousa, Giang and Williamson all crossed the line to some extent. What have all these guys got in common? The are all American. The players who impressed by handling both defeat and victory with class and equinimity were Vaswani, Vogl, de Knijff, Bush, Colclough and Maxfield. Surprise, surprise, they are all European. Now, I am being a little bit unfair maybe. There are several Americans who act well at the table: Juanda, Phillips, Lindgren, Lederer, Forrest, Cloutier and Scotty Nugyen all spring to mind.

But, the fact remains, Europe is a far more enjoyable and congennial place to play poker. We should cherish and cultivate our good fortune and make sure anyone who gets out of line should be reminded of his/her responsibilty to the rest of the poker community. We fight hard over the tables, yet there remains a level of respect and friendship which should be admired.

We are lucky indeed. Let's stay lucky.

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

Go on a Fantastic Journey...

On the top right hand corner of this page theere is a button which says "next blog". Click on it and you will be randomly transported to another blog. Keep clicking and see where you end up.

You will see some of the most bizarre things you can imagine.

It will make you worry intensely about the state of the World's psyche.

But it is incredibly compulsive.

Do it. You know you want to.

Monday, August 23, 2004

The things some people will do to save $11

Word has reached me of a naughty little ruse an online player perpetrated recently.

After a heavy night on the sauce he stumbled into his house at about half past midnight. Naturally he fired up the computer to see who had been saying what about whom on the various poker fora.

He also logged onto to Poker Stars to see what was happening. A juicy $10+1 rebuy tournament was starting in 30 minutes. Emboldened by the vino he thought "No problemo, I will iron out the other 800 runners in a couple of hours and have a bit spending money for my hols next week"

With 30 minutes to kill our hero thought he'd have a little nap before the tourny started. Obviously, the booze took over and it was lights out for about 4 hours. when he woke up, he rushed to the computer to be confronted by the ominous "table closed" sign and the realisation he had been anted away.

Well, our hero wasn't going to take the loss of $11 without a fight. He dashed off an email to Poker Stars support claiming after he bought in his house caught on fire and burned down.

Poker Stars did the honourable thing and wished him well and was glad he was ok and refunded his account $11. Satisfied, our hero retired to bed.

Fast forward 6 months to the bar at Binions Horseshoe during the WSOP...

A friend of the hero was having a quiet bottle of Bud when he got talking to a friendly petrol...

As you do in these situations he asked what he did for a living... "actually I work for customer services for Poker Stars"

Well, this was too much for Mr Friend to resist, and he recounted the whole house burning tale.

The Poker Stars man couldn't believe his ears...it was his decision to refund the hero his $11! "I doubted the story was true, would you email us 4 hours after your house had burned down? But, if it was true we could hardly refuse him and if it was a story he deserved the $11 for making up such a fanciful tale!" Just as Friend came to the end of the tale along came the hero to the bar for a drink.

Mr Poker Stars confronted him but our hero was not to be embarassed. "Poker Stars have got plenty, they can afford giving me my $11"

And what if they had refused? "Well, I was going to send them an envelope full of ash just to make them feel guilty!"

Top Trumps...

A version of the great game to savour:

is here

Browse the whole site.

Very, very funny.

But please don't go there if you are easily offended, as it does contain language which might upset you.

Sunday, August 22, 2004

Stolen from The Independent

A feature on the Edinburgh festival had the "50 best jokes".

The 3 which tickled me in particular were:

"Dodo died, Dodi died, Di died, Dando died... Surely Dido's looking a bit worried. Colin & Fergus at the Pleasance"

"You have to remember all the trivia that your girlfriend tells you, because eventually you get tested. She'll go: "What's my favourite flower?" And you murmur to yourself: "Shit, I wasn't listening ... Self-raising?" Addy Van-Der-Borgh at the Assembly Rooms"

"I went to the airport to check in and they asked what I did because I looked like a terrorist. I said I was a comedian. They said, "Say something funny then." I told them I had just graduated from flying school Ahmed Ahmed at C34"

All 50 can be found here: http://enjoyment.independent.co.uk/theatre/features/story.jsp?story=553660

Friday, August 20, 2004

You can't say I didn't give it a chance....

The Television coverage of the World Poker Championships is dire.

Case closed.

I watched the first episode a couple of weeks ago, which featured what should have been a terrific heads up match between 2 great players: Carlos Mortensen and Ram Vaswani. Instead it was a comedy of errors, the commentators calling the wrong hands and cameras missing vital moments.

I like Billy the Croc. He seems like a good guy. But his commentary style is dreadful, he never seems to know what exactly is going on, calling the hands and the draws incorrectly regularly. Is it a coincidence that Billy is the same nationality and a friend of the tournament organiser Mel Judah?

There is so many cliches in the commentary it is embarrassing.

MadYank does alot of the voice overs. Why on earth did the producers or whoever tell him to talk like he's wearing a very tight pair of Y-Fronts while sitting in a tank of water?

The woman who does the player interviews obviously knows absolutely nothing about poker. They might as well have used Jim Britton to do these segments.

And as for camera work... it reminds me of a home video. They don't know where to point their lenses. It is just so unprofessional.

The atmosphere in the Merrion reminds me of a darts match between two rival pubs. Shouting and cat calls. It just doesn't seem like they are playing for 1/4 million Euro.

And pot limit poker just doesn't work on TV. You need the excitement of the big allin move to keep the viewers interest. In pot limit you always need an accurate count of the players chips, something this coverage does not provide.

The main problem is seemingly the lack of post production. Alot of these errors could have been rectified. But, it just seems to be a rushed job.

I haven't even touched on several complaints from the players about the organisation of the event. That isn't my beef. Although one player who attended did say "if you employ clowns to run a show, the result will be a circus".

It is a terrible TV programme and I won't be watching another episode.

Monday, August 16, 2004

The incomparable Mr Willy Tann

Willy Tann won the Grosvenor UK Open at Luton this weekend. There couldn't be a more popular winner. Willy is a true gentleman and a phenominal poker player.

We played on the same table for about 7 hours through the tournament and I would like to share one hand where Willy showed his true brilliance.

The blinds were 300-600. I had the BB. Willy raised to 1600, everyone quickly passed. I called in the BB with QJ. Willy had about 18,000 at this stage, I had about 35,000.

The flop came T92. I checked and Willy bet 3000. Willy usually bets the flop after raising so this was no surprise to me. I decided to call rather than semi bluff reraise. The turn was a blank, a 5 or something. I checked, hoping to get a free card, which I received when Willy checked too. I now was pretty sure Willy had a hand like a big ace, as I was certain he would bet any sort of pair on this board.

The river paired the deuce. Going with my read I bet out 6000. This represented nearly half of Willys remaining stack. He went into the tank and called me with KJ. An amazing call I think you will agree. But it was Willy's actions afterwards that impressed me more than anything. There was no crowing, no arrogance and definitely no rub downs.

Five minutes later he put his hand on my shoulder and said "Now please, don't go on tilt Keith" and I know he really meant it too.

I know Willy has had his knockers, but he really is a gentleman, and over the years has given me tons of valuable advice. He has an impeccible table presence and never has a bad word for anyone. I couldn't be happier he won the tournament and trust there will be many more triumphs to come in the years ahead.

Willy Tann is a legend. End of story.

You think I'm a misanthrope?

According to Richard Gryko I am becoming a fully fledged misanthrope.

Check out this website.


Maddox puts me in the shade.

The funniest articles IMO are "I am better than your kids" and "More crappy children's art work".

But there are many other gems.


Sunday, August 15, 2004

Poker Quiz

Which poker player was being referred to by a top player when he gave me this valuable piece of advice?

"Never do business with the mentally unbalanced"

Friday, August 13, 2004

Someone call Interpol!

We seem to have a diplomatic incident on our hands.

An individual, commonly known as "The Ambassador" seems to have disappeared without trace.

Frantic house to house inquiries have been fruitless so far. The Ambassador was last spotted on the popular poker website "sportingoddspoker.com" but when officers checked the site all evidence of the fellow seemed to have been erased.

Several friends of the Ambassador are very concerned for his welfare, as before he vanished he nipped quite alot of money. Obviously they are not worried about the cash in the hands of such an honourable man as these actions are totally out of character.

Reports that he may not resurface until January at the Aussie Millions are surely unfounded and we can only hope the Ambassador turns up safe and sound in the very near future.

Thursday, August 12, 2004

Communication Let Me Down!

All phone lines must have been blocked from the Grosvenor Victoria Casino, London to the Grosvenor Casino, Luton.

How else can we explain how a player who was banned from the Vic last week for cheating not only played in a tournament at Luton's current festival, he made the final table!

All I can say is congratulations to the player concerned and ask the question: in this days of high technology how come you can be banned from every casino in the land for winning a few quid at roulette, yet a casino cannot relay the fact to casinos within its own group that a poker player has been caught cheating?

Sunday, August 08, 2004

An interesting site

Not sure how many will have read the account of Andy Bloch's attempt to win the 1997 WSOP main event.

But, even if you have, I'm sure it's worth reading again.


It's absolutely fascinating.

Saturday, August 07, 2004

The Racing Post is 'aving a laff

The Racing Post Sports section used to be the bible for sports gamblers. It boasted Mark Coton and Paul Johnson, both excellent tipsters and top notch journalists. Before having a bet, the Post was required reading. No more.

The standard of journalism is only higher than the standard of selections they give. The writers seem to have no concept of the principle of value betting, merely tipping what they think will happen rather than the value selection. And the notion of "no bet is the best bet" has obviously never occurred to these guys.

All are to blame, but probably the worst offender is Ian Coyne. He regularly tips up correct score and half-time/full-time selections on football matches where the percentage hold for the bookie is the highest and the chance of finding a value selection is remote in the extreme.

I must absolve Kevin Pullein from guilt for the Post malaise as although he is a dreadfully dull writer, his selections are at least well thought out and he may well be a long term winning punter. I would offer big odds any of the others on the sports desk are winners.

I will give two brief examples of the state of decline of the Racing Post.

In Thursday's Post there was a chunky preview pullout for the new football season. Full of facts, stats and pretty dreadful journalism.

The worst two pieces of advice, in my opinion, were these:

1. Paul Kealy's 3rd tip for exchange punters is "Never be afraid to guarantee a no-lose book. The team you have backed is a goal ahead with minutes left on the clock. Do you close out for a profit or let it ride to collect the full payout? The choice is yours, but when you're in a great position there really is no excuse for not at least covering your stake. Hard-luck stories are ten-a-penny in football matches - just listen to the late goals flying in on Soccer Saturday".

This is complete and utter bollocks. It shows the mentality of a loser. You should never hedge unless the new bet (and it should always be considered a new bet) is a value bet. To lay off with say, 10 minutes to go, is giving up a large percentage of your potential winnings and over the long term will cost you money.

2. Mark Langdon is responsible for the other travesty. He advises his readers to have a double on Thierry Henry to be Arsenal's top scorer this season at 1/4 and Ruud Van Nistlerooy to be top Man Utd goal getter at 4/9. The double pays about 8/11.

This is tipping at its laziest. He's obviously spent 3 seconds looking at the betting and said "Of course, the favourites are shurtanties!! Lump on!!!". There are the little matter of injuries, loss of form, a great season by a team mate (Utd have got Saha and Smith who aren't too bad last time I checked) and the ever present possibility of a transfer abroad to consider. If 8/11 is value I'll eat my hat. You can have as much on at evens with me as you like.

If you follow the Posts selections for sports you might as well flush your money down the toilet. In fact, that is probably a better way to spend your money. It will save alot of hassle and time..

Friday, August 06, 2004

The Racing Post is no good...

...can I do better?

I will post a few selections on various sports now and again and hopefully make a few quid. At least I will keep a running score of how I'm doing, unlike the Posts scattergun approach to staking..

If you choose to follow the selections, don't come looking for me if we do our money.

Caveat Emptor and all that.


100pts West Brom to finish above Crystal Palace (4/5 Chandlers)
10pts Plymouth to be promoted to the Premiership (18/1 Hills)
10pts buy the field Championship index (@12 Sporting)
10pts Bournemouth to be promoted to the Championship (14/1 Tote)

More to follow...

Thursday, August 05, 2004

The 11th Commandment

It didn't take long for me to come across a poker annoyance which I didn't include in my article for the Hendon Mob.

It goes something like this.

An online poker pot is split between two players, for ease I will christen them Tosser 1 and Tosser 2. An exchange like this usually occurs on conclusion of the hand:

Tosser 1: "nh"
Tosser 2: "ty u2"
Tosser 1: "lol"
Tosser 2: "lol"

The first time in the history of online poker it might have caused 0.1% of of a smile to say "nh" to the player you split it with, now it just anally retentive and banal.

If you can laugh out loud at a split pot I think there is no hope for you. The men in white coats are coming to take you away shortly...

Tuesday, August 03, 2004

Poker Skool rools ok?

There is an old saying which goes something like this: "those who can do, those who can't teach".

Pokerpages for one and Mark Strahan for two both run poker schools. My advice would be, keep your money in your pocket.

You cannot learn how to play poker from a book or from a computer program or by listening to someone armed with felt tip pens and an overhead projector.

There is only one way to learn and that is to play.

The problem is everyone has a different style and by trying to learn from a teacher you will undoubtadly learn his/her style. And that is completly pointless. Let's say your teacher is a granite rock who tells you only to enter pots with premium hands and you are a creative soul, this would be totally alien to you. You should be playing lots of pots and darting in and out and nicking plenty.

The complete ludicrousness of going to poker school is best illustrated by Mark Strahan's advice to his pupils when they hold AA in a tournament. I am reliably informed he tells his students to go allin whenever they have aces because "you know you've got the best hand"!!!! D'oh. With people like that helping you, you don't need hinderance!

Playing for play money is also a waste of time too I reckon. You have 1000 in play money when someone goes allin for 1000. You haven't got much, but you are REALLY interested in what the other player has got. So you call. You lose. But what do you lose? Nothing! Poker is pointless if bluffing is taken out of the game. And in play money games/practice games at poker schools bluffing is pointless.

The only reliable way to learn how to play poker in the way which suits you is to play poker. Watch, listen and learn while you are playing. You don't have to play big stakes. Just play.

I hate to moan...

But, it's my blog and for fucks sake I'm getting just about sick of this..

I am short stacked in the pot limit holdem event at WCOOP, when this hand occured:

PokerStars Game #589509319: Tournament #1742801, Hold'em Pot Limit - Level II
(15/30) - 2004/08/03 - 15:39:40 (ET)
Table '1742801 56' Seat #9 is the button
Seat 5: tortxof (2875 in chips)
Seat 6: TheHuncher (2015 in chips)
Seat 3: The Camel (895 in chips)
Seat 4: lincoln65 (4185 in chips)
Seat 7: FLYINGCBAR (2470 in chips)
Seat 8: matt674 (2020 in chips)
Seat 1: tpope212 (1010 in chips)
Seat 2: osten (5105 in chips)
Seat 9: bbmoney (1925 in chips)
tpope212: posts small blind 15
osten: posts big blind 30
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to The Camel [As Ad]
matt674 said, "pokerstars special"
The Camel: raises 60 to 90
lincoln65: folds
tortxof: folds
TheHuncher: folds
matt674: folds
bbmoney: folds
tpope212: folds
osten: calls 60
*** FLOP *** [Td 5s 8s]
osten: checks
The Camel: bets 120
osten: raises 390 to 510
The Camel: raises 295 to 805 and is all-in
osten: calls 295
*** TURN *** [Td 5s 8s] [7s]
*** RIVER *** [Td 5s 8s 7s] [9c]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
osten: shows [6h Th] (a straight, Six to Ten)
The Camel: shows [As Ad] (a pair of Aces)
osten collected 1805 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 1805 | Rake 0
Board [Td 5s 8s 7s 9c]
Seat 5: tortxof folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 6: TheHuncher folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 3: The Camel showed [As Ad] and lost with a pair of Aces
Seat 4: lincoln65 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 7: FLYINGCBAR folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 8: matt674 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 1: tpope212 (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 2: osten (big blind) showed [6h Th] and won (1805) with a straight, Six to
Seat 9: bbmoney (button) folded before Flop (didn't bet)

Monday, August 02, 2004

Craig Grant... "Master Entertainer"

The Hendon Mob have asked me to write a column for their website. I chose to make a list of 10 things which annoy me about other poker players.

Obviously this list is far from comprehensive. And Koumari Boy pointed out a gem which I overlooked. It's when you are allin in a tournament and you show perhaps TT and your opponent shows KK. You are funking for a ten obviously, until some genius says "Oooh I passed two tens" leaving you drawing practically dead. Just keep quiet and give the player his funking rights please.

This got me in reminiscent mood. It reminded me of my favourite Craig Grant tale. Now, anyone who has come into contact with Mr Grant knows he is quite an interesting character. He likes to tell stories. In fact, if he was Pinocchio, his nose would be so long, birds could use it as a perch.

Anyway, this episode took place at the Aviation club, Paris. Two tables out in a 1000 Franc no limit holdem tournament a friend of mine from the sadly defunct Reading cardroom, Stefan, raised in first position, Craig now reraises from middle position. A very tight German player goes allin. Stefan immediately reraises again allin.

Now Craig goes dramatically goes into the tank. He hums and haws. He counts and recounts his chips. He cogitates and contemplates. Eventually he says to Stef, "I hope you've got what you're representing, I am going to pass 2 queens", and throws his hand away. The German proudly turns over two aces, while Stefan rather sheepishly turns over the other two Queens.

The German is clearly feeling pretty good.. Barring some miracle straight he can't lose...

The dealer turns over the community cards, seven, four, deuce, jack and.... obviously Queen!

At first I thought it was hilarious. But, on reflection how must the German have felt? He went from a 1-99 favourite to be chip leader, to on the rail. He must of been gutted.

The moral? Never listen to what someone says about what they threw away. It is invariably bullshit, as the players who have the class not to bs about their hands would invariably keep mum to give the players in question their funking rights...

Bend Over and Take it Like a Man

I am still in a state of shock.

Last night in the $500+15 No Limit Holdem tournament on Pokerstars, the fifth event of WCOOP, there was a massive entry of 1642 with ensuing huge prize money, the pinnacle being the top prize of $180,620.

I was chugging along nicely with just over 200 left. I had well over the chip average with approximately 18,000 when the following hand occurred. Blinds are 300-600 with a running ante of 50. I have the BB. Everyone passes to the SB, who is a very aggressive Swedish player (you know what these Scandis are like!) who has slightly more chips than me, he raises it up to 1800. I have QQ. I reraise him 3600. He calls. Flop comes Q83 rainbow. Swede moves allin. I call (d'oh, obviously). On their backs, he shows T9 hearts. And the river brings a Jack (also, obviously).

Julian Gardner wrote this a Hendon Mob pro-tip over a year ago, "It's not how you play the hand where you take the bad beat. It's how you play the next one."

Now this all is very well and good if you're not a Grade 1 crack up merchant like me. The first time I played the main event at the WSOP I lost with AA v QQ when a he rivered a queen. I proceeded to drop a five figure fortune on the craps table in the next hour.

When I make mistake that costs me chips, I can accept it. Live and learn and hopefully never make that mistake again. But, the red mist tends to fall when I suffer a bad beat. Especially in a big tournament. For a short period of time, I wonder if playing poker is worthwhile, when so much of the outcome is down to luck. When the poker Gods frown on me that's when I am most vunerable.

Recently I have felt like a punchbag, taking beat after beat, punishing me for all the good fortune I've had for the last 2 years. What can I do to help me clamber up from the canvas over and over again?

All these poker magazines and websites have plenty of guff about how to play AK in the BB for two preflop raises or whether to play suited conectors in a tight game on the button. Why don't they publish something useful like how to get off tilt? Or how to play when steaming drunk? Or playing aginst someone you really hate?

With no craps tables available in my living room here in Darlington, the first reaction was to throw the computer out of the window. But, I tried something new. I bought in for $30 on a Pokerstars 25c-50c limit holdem table and for the next 30 minutes I terrorised them. If I had any pair or any draw, however remote, I would raise or reraise when it was my turn. I lost my 30 bucks sure enough, but had great fun, I cracked aces with 64 and twice made a backdoor straight when I only had 3 to the straight on the flop.

It was a cathartic experience. All tilt was removed and I slept pretty soundly. Perhaps I've discovered the cure for tilt... Putting 8 others players on tilt cures your case!

Meanwhile...has anyone else got any solution they find effective?
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